If my skin is the wall that shields me from the world, then touch is the hole in the wall where the world breathes through, in and out, keeping me alive.
Can you really live in a world without touch?
I can let go of many things in my life, but I can't live without touch. Touch strips everything down to the basics. When I touch things, they become real to me. It makes me feel and connect.
We need touch to feel safe, to build trust, and to remind us that we are not alone—that we belong. We need touch to take a break from ourselves. to ease our mind and comfort pain. We need touch simply because it feels so good and pleasurable.
Touch is the silent language. It doesn't lie, it doesn't manipulate. It envelops us and creates a connection in ways words never could. As Margaret Atwood wrote, "Touch comes before sight, before speech. It is the first language and the last, and it always tells the truth."
Touch is also not a one-dimensional experience. Pain and pleasure are two sides of it. A touch can be an invitation or a warning, tender or possessive, healing or hurting, casual or profound.
To touch someone is to cross an invisible boundary. It is an act of trust, vulnerability, and connection.
What’s unique about touch is that it’s two ways. While we can look without being looked at, or listen without responding, we can’t touch without being touched back. When we touch water, we get wet; when we touch fire, we burn; and when we touch someone’s skin, we feel.
We use touch to communicate our feelings or intentions to people, and at the same time, we feel their response in return by how they react to our touch or how they touch us back.
Where do you touch from?
Our language of touch is greatly influenced by where we come from and the culture we grew up in. And much like our mother tongue, touch isn’t just another language we speak; it is a language we feel. The delicate nuances and unwritten rules we absorb from an early age, define how we experience and express it.
In some places, touch is everywhere, part of everyday life. In others, it is unusual, treated like a treasure or a closely held secret. Cultural norms shape not just our comfort with touch but also how we experience intimacy and connection.
Every time I see my Thai friends, I love teasing them with a big, warm hug when we greet or say goodbye. It’s what I do with my family. We’ve known each other for years, but still, every time I wrap them in my arms, I can feel their awkwardness and discomfort;)
And yet, beneath all these cultural codes and differences, touch remains what it has always been—a basic need we all share to connect, to feel close, to comfort, and express ourselves without words.
among all the forms of touch—affection, healing, comfort, erotic, and sexual—the last one remains a mystery to me. You can think you know people, talk with them, see them, and even spend a long time with them, but you will never truly know their sexual touch until you both are naked under the sheets.
In those intimate moments the magical transformative power of sex can mysteriously change who we are and how we touch. When we completely turn on and all our masks and societal expectations are turned off, our touch becomes intuitive, spontaneous, and unexpected. In those moments, the line connecting touch to culture dissolves. We are free, and we are real.
Let’s be in touch
In today’s digital fast-forward world, where it’s so easy to ‘keep in touch’, touch has been going through a rough time and is becoming less and less popular. We spend more time in the reel world than in the real one and we ‘touch screen’ more often than we touch each other’s skin.
This absence of touch, leaves many of us isolated, dry inside, thirsty —not for water , but for the warmth, healing, and connection that only a hug or a gentle touch can give.
Interacting more and more with technology and less and less with humans also changes the way we touch. Once upon a time, we learned about touch and sex the analog way—we went out, touched people, felt them, made love, and learned through real, personal experience. Today, we go online, touch screens, make likes and learn through social media and virtual experiences. Porn is our mentor, avatars are our lovers, and any chance for Intimacy is lost in the pixels.
When things we learn are imprinted in our bodies through actions, touch, and experiences in the world, they become real to us. Talking about intimate touch often feels distant and vague until we actually touch one another. Women's sexual pleasure is just an idea... until your hands touch your vagina. What flows through our bodies transforms into movement, warmth, and life. This is the power of touch to translate words into life.
I meet women who haven't felt a loving touch in years. I see young girls asking for rougher, faster, deeper sensations, afraid of soft, slow intimate touch. When I touch women, I sense their bodies craving that connection. All this playing it cool, just to meet some standard or not look desperate, creates an emotional void from not having meaningful touch and real connection.
I want to help women rediscover the transformative power of touch. To feel truly seen and connected, not just performing. Because when we open ourselves to that kind of intimacy, it has the power to fill the voids in our lives.
The world is changing but our basic needs stay. we might not always inotice, but it’s definitely there, waiting to be touched.